My husband and I have made some big changes in our life
recently. They aren’t obvious to the
casual observer but I have been reeling a bit as a result. Reeling and getting anxious.
I have realized that I am highly susceptible to stress. I have an anxiety issue that I keep in check with a combination of medication and natural means. Occasionally, however, the stress level peaks and knocks me off my equilibrium. This causes the typical symptoms of anxiety like the adrenaline rush, stomach upset, dry mouth and jitters. Some episodes are worse than others.
I have realized that I am highly susceptible to stress. I have an anxiety issue that I keep in check with a combination of medication and natural means. Occasionally, however, the stress level peaks and knocks me off my equilibrium. This causes the typical symptoms of anxiety like the adrenaline rush, stomach upset, dry mouth and jitters. Some episodes are worse than others.

Then the lights come on and the basement is actually quite cozy and the noises are just the hot water heater.
So the light came on in my brain and I may not be able to
see the destination but I am on the path and it’s rather nice, a little bumpy,
a few curves, but I know I have the strength
to navigate it and no matter where it ends I will make it and be a better
person for it.
Anxiety

I have pictured and named my inner lizard, in order to
become able to soothe the lack and attack thoughts using the higher, more ‘evolved’
brain.
Beck says:
“This silly visualization is actually a very serious,
powerful exercise, rooted in sound psychological and neurological evidence. It
may in fact, physically change your brain. By calling on the non-reptilian part
of your neural complex to watch the reptile, you subtract neural energy from
survival fear and move it to a more highly evolved portion of the brain.”
When your lizard starts wringing it’s claws and bleating
terrifying predictions stop and ask yourself “What am I really afraid of?”
What am I really afraid of?
When I started identifying the fears that were causing this particular
bout of anxiety I realized how ridiculous they each were once in the full
glaring light of reason.
Usually when I follow these thoughts to their source I find
that they all stem from the same basic fears that are part of every human: fear
of debilitation and painful death all alone, poor, and nobody loves me.
Okay, maybe this is just me.
But I am sure your core fears are really along the same lines.
So that is when I need to comfort my lizard and remind her
that everything will be okay and she doesn’t need to freak out.
My lizard is Louise. She is technically a chameleon, not a lizard, since she is afraid of being a target. She tries to hide, she curls up tight and hunches over almost fetal. She has a medical condition so I need to be very careful what I feed her. Her favorite thing to eat is fear. She will eat it until she is full and fat and completely terrified.
Which leaves me feeling like I want to crawl into a hole and
die.
